10 Mindsets to Get You Through ANY Stressful Situation
There are certain core mindsets that are applicable across the board, in all areas of endeavour.
Situations of importance can cause us stress. When there is something at stake pressure mounts, and anxiety and stress often creep in.
When in potentially stressful situations – social situations, dating, making love, giving speeches, working in a job, making art, playing sports, competing in any area, trying to ‘get ahead’ in life, dealing with interpersonal relationships, dealing with painful emotions such as depression or anxiety – it helps to have mindsets that can keep us calm and instill a healthy sense of perspective.
Here are 10 mindsets to get you through ANY stressful situation.
Chose To Enjoy EVERY Moment of Life, Whether ‘Good’, ‘Bad’ or ‘Indifferent’
We will all be dead relatively soon. Life is short. Enjoy and deeply savour THIS moment, whatever it is that you happen to be doing. Even if it is something mundane, a pain in the ass, or unpleasant, chose to find enjoyment in simply being ALIVE.
Live every moment with joy and excitement. Do every task to the best of your ability. Squeeze every last drop of juice from life.
By far the biggest gift that any of us could ever receive is… being alive now.
NOTHING Is Worth Stressing About
Life is too short to stress.
When you consider that you are alive now, against all the odds, for a brief sliver of time, you can get a sense of perspective on the usually silly things that you allow to stress you out.
When you contemplate the vastness of the cosmos, the infinity of time, and the shortness of a human lifespan, no worldly concerns should stress you out.
Let situations and people be whatever they happen to be. Enjoy your brief stint on planet Earth.
What Doesn’t Kill You Makes You Stronger
Rejections, mistakes, failures, social embarrassments… all of these reversals can make you stronger, better, and happier in the long run, IF you allow them too.
Learning to embrace and use failures and rejections to your advantage will massively improve your effectiveness in the world.
FUCK What Other People Think
FUCK what any other person happens to think about you or your life choices. How another person thinks about you is THEIR business, not yours.
Live life on your own terms. Nobody knows what is right for you, but you!
Any thoughts that may be buzzing around inside another person’s brain about you are benign and none of your concern.
People Think Better Of You (and LESS About You) Than You Tend To Imagine
For people with self-esteem issues, emotional-reasoning often tells them they are low-value, and they assume that the world sees them in the same way.
But emotional-reasoning is an irrational thought error. Low self-esteem is usually a baseless thought habit, developed in early childhood.
For people with low self-esteem, the world tends to see them as better than they see themselves.
Personalization is another common cognitive distortion. Many of us feel as if the world revolves around us. We think everybody notices and is paying attention to us.
The truth is that the vast majority of people are overwhelmingly concerned with themselves and how they are being perceived.
So you can rest easy in the comforting knowledge that people are really not paying as much attention to you as you think!
Choose To See Every Person As Your Friend
How you act towards a person has a massive impact on they act towards you. If you give every person the benefit of the doubt and treat them immediately as a friend, they will almost always reciprocate in kind.
Believing that every person is your friend becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Accept your flaws, weaknesses, imperfections, strengths, quirks, idiosyncrasies, your personality, your appearance – EVERYTHING. Accept every aspect of yourself. Accept 100% your imperfectability. Love your messy humanness.
Be a master of saying a clean and clear NO to things you do not want to do. This saves vast amounts of time, energy, and stress.
Ask For What You Want, Like a Dog
Ask for what you want (and be willing to hear “no”). The world can’t know what you want unless you ask for it. Even learn to be glad when you are rejected because it is evidence that you tried, which is all you ever can do!
Don’t Try Too Hard in Social Situations – Lower Your Standards!
Nonchalance is attractive. Trying too hard to be liked is unattractive and needy.
In social situations, have the courage to relax and be yourself.
Friendly, mediocre, chit-chat is good enough. What matters is that you are connecting, not that you are connecting perfectly. There are no standards. Relax, connect… imperfectly.