The Life-Changing Magic Of Not Giving a Fuck
’The Life-Changing Magic Of Not Giving A Fuck’ by Sarah Knight is a pop-psychology book that packs a punch.
It is written in a simple and breezy style that could put-off readers who are used to devouring denser prose.
But while the writing style is elementary and self-consciously millennial in its tone, and the book’s main message is one-dimensional and super-simple. It is a book that could have a very profound effect on the lives of those who read it.
How To Give Less Of A Fuck
The book’s main message is not original. It is a message that has been delivered in an infinity of ways, by an infinity of people over the millennia. But as any person with even the slightest touch of neuroticism (and, let’s face it, everybody else too) can attest, taking this key message to heart is difficult, often to the point of being unattainable!
So what is this key message??
The Life-Changing Magic Of Not Giving A Fuck tells its readers to decide what they don’t give a fuck about and to stop giving a fuck about those things. And the core message, underlying all of these fucks not given, the ultimate fuck that we would all benefit immeasurable from not giving…
We need to not give a fuck about how people judge us and think about us.
Stop Giving A Fuck About What People Think Of You
This is the key message of the book. And it’s as true now as has been every other time it’s be espoused, in slightly different ways, down the millennia.
Giving a fuck about the judgements of others is harmful to us and it takes a massive toll on our psychological well-being. It also often prevents us from living as we want to live, from truly being ourselves, and from doing what we really want to do with our one and only (all too brief) life.
So, a central message that is not new. Most readers, especially if they are at all familiar with the self-help genre, will have been told to not care what other people think about them quite a few times before.
What makes ‘The Life-Changing Magic Of Not Giving A Fuck’ excellent and unique is the way Sarah Knight guides the reader through a simple systematic method of cleanly and clearly deciding what they-themselves truly don’t give a fuck about.
Be True To YOU!
Knight stresses that only you can decide what you do or do not give a fuck about. Not your parents, not your friends, not polite society, not the church, not the government, not your boss. You must access your own individual mind and heart. What do you actually not give a fuck about?? Forget about should, and ought to, be honest with yourself.
We Have A Limited ‘Fuck Budget’
Sarah Knight rightly points out that we have only so many fucks to give. If we are going through the motions and forcing ourselves to give fucks about things that we feel we should give a fuck about. Or that we feel obligated to give a fuck about. Or that we are pretending to ourselves that we give a fuck about. Or that we are irrationally and neurotically giving a fuck about but really shouldn’t! If we are giving fucks to things we don’t truly give a fuck about then we have fewer fucks to give to the things we truly DO give a fuck about!
It’s a powerful message. What mental junk are you dragging around with you? What fucks are you giving that you really would be much better off cutting loose and forgetting about. Ahhhh, relief!
Knight breaks life into four areas. Things (which includes inanimate objects and concepts), Work, Other People (strangers, acquaintances, friends), and Family.
Declutter Your ‘Mental Barn’
She instructs the reader to sit on a hardwood floor with a pen and paper and thoroughly search through their ‘mental barn’ finding all of the stuff that’s being stored in there. From the almost forgotten relics hidden in the deep dark corners of the barn to the big obvious objects that take up tons of space. What are all of the potential fucks that are in your mental barn in each area? Make lists.
Once you have made comprehensive lists of everything that is stored in your mental barn that you could potentially give or not give a fuck about, go through your list and honestly DECIDE what you truly don’t give a fuck about. Once you cross these ‘don’t give a fuck’ items off your list a surprising calm and clarity descend upon you. It is a lovely experience.
The GIFT Of Finally Realising You Do Not Give A Fuck!
It is surprising how many things in each area we are going through the motions of giving a fuck about. Or we are lying to the world and to ourselves that we actually give a fuck about.
Letting things such as ‘visiting Iceland’, ‘gourmet burgers’, ‘whether other people think my girlfriend is attractive’, ‘my love handles’, ‘the size of my nose’ finally drift away into I ACTUALLY DON’T GIVE A FUCK deep space (hopefully never to be seen again) is wonderfully cathartic.
So buy the book and give it a read. It will have a surprisingly profound effect on your clarity of mind. It will declutter your mental space and leave you with a lot more energy to dedicate to the things and people in life that you actually DO give a fuck about.